How Writers Can Move Past Fear Of Negative Comments And Get On With Their Writing

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Is fear of receiving negative comments or reviews from readers stopping you from publishing your blog posts or books?

Or is fear or receiving negative, rude, or nasty comments preventing you from starting your writing project altogether?

You may for example want to start a blog; but are so fearful of being attacked with negative comments from readers that it prevents you from even getting started in the first place.

I have heard of writers and authors being so devastated from a negative review or comment that it stopped them from writing altogether for a long time, or discouraged them so badly that they basically stopped writing altogether.

Fear of being attacked with nasty rude comments isn’t all that uncommon among writers, bloggers, and authors.

We cannot however let these negative commenters stop us from writing or from even getting starting in the first place.

When I first started out as a free-lance writer several years ago I got a very rude nasty e-mail from a reader attacking me for an article I had written. I felt shocked at how blatantly rude this person was. Just “screaming and raging” at me for something she disagreed with.

It was a horrible feeling. I felt as if my very being was being attacked. I was stunned that somebody could be this rude and ignorant.

I really didn’t know how to handle it, as I was a novice free-lance writer at the time. I thought I had to respond to this nasty commenter. I responded in a very polite manner. And now I regret that I did. I felt more angry at myself for responding to this troll than I did at the nasty comment itself. Lesson learned: I now know I do not have to respond to nasty rude commenters. They don’t deserve my time or attention.

Learn from my mistakes. Do not give these internet trolls that kind of power. Or any kind of power for that matter.no-negativityThere is nothing wrong with disagreeing with something someone has written; or having an opposing viewpoint.

However, there is a way to approach it. You do not just start attacking the person and bombarding them with nasty rude comments.

You simply state what you disagree with and why.

Constructive criticism and opposing viewpoints are perfectly okay and acceptable. We can always learn something from constructive criticism. And opposing viewpoints may help us to see an issue from another perspective.

Attacking someone with negative rude comments however is not acceptable. Nobody benefits from nasty commenters. Just ignore them; as they do not deserve your time and attention.

So, how do you get past your fear of negative comments and get on with your writing?

A simple shift in awareness will go a long way in abating your fear.

The first order of business is to recognize these negative commenters for who and what they are. When you become aware of where these negative commenters are coming from your fear will subside to some extent.

So who are these readers that dish out nasty rude comments and reviews?

One of the most common types of readers that leave nasty comments or reviews are The Haters. The haters are angry people. The haters will hate on anybody. If they can’t get a reaction from you; they will move on to the next blogger, writer, or author.

One thing to remember is that nasty rude comments are ultimately about the commenter. It is not about anything you wrote.

These people are just so angry that they are looking for any excuse to take their anger out on someone or something.

raging-womanYour blog post or book just happened to be in their path, so they decided to take their anger out on you and your blog post or book. They usually don’t even really care about what you have written; whey just want to rage at someone. They need an excuse to act out their anger. And just about any excuse will do.

They are looking to get a reaction from you.

These angry people usually attack you rudely with a “how dare you” attitude.  This is unacceptable and you do not need to respond to these people. Hit the delete button if it is in your control to do so. Or just ignore them.

Then there are The Criticizers.  The criticizers are insecure people. They have to put you down in order to feel good about themselves. There is nothing wrong with constructive criticism as discussed earlier. But the criticizers do just one thing. And that is criticize.

They need to criticize other people in order to compensate for some perceived inadequacy in themselves.

Some of them may even want to be writers themselves and are afraid to take the risk of starting their own blog or writing their own book. So they have to put you down in order to compensate for their own fear and anxiety about becoming a writer. Because you were brave enough to accomplish what they could not.

Criticizers may also be afraid of being criticized themselves. Which is one reason they might feel the need to criticize other people.

Now that we have covered some ways you can deal with nasty rude commenters; it’s time to take a look at some of the ways you can deal with legitimate negative reviews.

Legitimate negative reviews are those that fall in the categories of constructive criticism and opposing view points. Even though these comments are not nasty or rude; they can still be hard to take.

Dealing with legitimate negative reviews requires a shift in your mind set; just as we have done with the nasty commenters. Except this time we are going to learn how to see negative comments in a positive way.

Your first reaction to a negative review is likely to be that of disappointment.

However, by shifting your awareness to a positive mind set you can see how negative reviews can actually benefit you as a writer.

Here are a few ways that negative reviews can be looked at in a positive light.

  • Negative reviews can be a good thing as long as they are mixed with some positive reviews. It means your work is effecting readers on an emotional level. Mixed reviews show that your writing is stirring up a lot of different feelings in your readers. Your readers are emotionally engaged in your book. All positive reviews may not be the best thing. Mixed reviews show that your are engaging readers at an emotional level. This is what you want.
  • Negative reviews also show that at least people are reading your books or blog posts. Some authors, writers, and bloggers don’t even get that much. Nobody is reading their blog posts or books. At least your work is being recognized.
  • Negative reviews show that you are taking risks. You were brave enough to write and publish your blog post or book; which very few people actually accomplish. It is estimated that about 82% of people say they want to write a book; but only about 1% actually do. So you have already accomplished what most people never dare to do. Now that’s something to be proud of!
  • You can learn how to improve your writing from negative reviews. Pay attention to negative reviews because they will tell you what you need to work on in your writing. They will show you what you could have done better. You will know how to improve your writing for your next book. The one star reviewers are actually doing you a favor by showing you how you can improve your writing.

Have you ever had to deal with nasty rude comments from readers? How did you handle it? Let us know in the comments below.

 

 

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